I love the little acronyms they come up with in 12-step groups. And fear has a few of them:

F– False

E-Evidence

A-Appearing

R-Real

Or:

F: Face

E: Everything

A: And

R: Recover

or the more humorous:

F– F**k

E– Everything

A– And

R– Run!

Fear has a way of creeping in sometimes. It can feel like everything is going reasonably okay, but then, at 2 am, those fearful thoughts can pop up that were kept quiet by keeping busy with day-to-day life.

I remember, after my ex and I separated, having many valid questions that spiraled into fearful thoughts like:

“What am I going to do for a living?” (Become a nurse!)

“Am I going to be able to keep the house?” (For a few years, yes.)

“How is this going to affect our kids?” (There’s probably good and bad that came of it, nothing is that black and white).

The biggest two things that helped me combat that fear were prayer and my family and friends. One of my friends would tell me to just “keep things in the day,” and that was one of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever gotten. There are times when I still use it today! It means that I don’t get too far ahead of myself, and focus on what is in front of me that I can actually do. What do I have control over? What is mine and what do I need to let go of?

When I’d find myself overthinking things and beginning a downward, fearful cycle, I’d talk to someone to get things out of my head. Things always, always look better out of my head. I can gain more perspective, and have things pointed out to me that I never would have noticed. And I talked to God. A lot.

Self-doubt

I dealt with a lot of self-doubt when I first started out as a nurse. I began working as a nurse in the middle of COVID, which was overwhelming at times. I dealt with it by using affirmations, asking lots of questions, and “faking it until I made it.” It took some time, but eventually I found myself feeling better about my work and more confident with my choices. Prayer and meditation played a huge part in this as well. And also- therapy!

We always have the choice to face things and recover or f**k everything and run. And sometimes not choosing is the choice. But facing things is better, I think. And even a little progress is better than no progress at all. 🙂

How do you deal with self-doubt and fear? I’d love to hear from you! And if you like what I write, please subscribe, thanks!